This is another exercise from my upcoming book “Falling in Love with Your True Self – Using self love to have healthier relationships, attract more abundance and finding your divine purpose”. This exercise can be used when you have people, situations, and experiences from your past that are holding you from moving into a happier present moment.
Identifying your wounds
To begin the process of healing your past you first need to identify what your wounds are. Your wounds can be described as anything that has happened to you that you haven’t forgiven, let go of or accepted as not affecting yourself today.
Carrying around that hurt day to day weighs you down like baggage that you are barely pulling behind you. Decisions you make, the way you trust people, the way you identify yourself can be defined by those unhealed wounds. It is difficult not to have those thoughts influence your daily thinking based on what someone did to you or what mistake you made.
Sometimes it is easy to list out what those wounds are, other times they subconsciously come to the surface during times of stress. Below is an exercise to help you figure out what are those things that hold you down the most.
What doesn’t make me feel good Exercise
For this exercise let’s not focus on specific details of the hurt, lets focus on the way it makes you feel. We don’t want to draw more energy into something that holds you back and makes you feel bad. We want to identify the feeling so that you can work to release and replace those feelings with better ones.
Cut up several pieces of paper, however many you think you would like to list out. On one side write down what is holding you back or that bothers you and move onto any other strong feelings that surface. An event or a person that you feel has done something that you can’t let go of is a good example. When you are ready pick up one that you can associate a base feeling about the situation or person. On the back of it write down words that you feel when you think of that situation or person. Here are some examples:
Childhood – Unappreciated, Withdrawn, Unloved
Ex Boyfriend (can put a name) – Insecure, Untrustworthy, Abandoned
A specific past job – Unsuccessful, Failure, Noncommittal
The purpose of this exercise is for you to find what you are holding on to and then associating it with an emotion. When you start to see the emotion it is easier to see the origin of that emotion. We can say someone did something to us in our past and hold onto anger and distrust. Once we bring it back to how we feel about that person we can begin to release that anger as we can take ownership for the emotion not the situation.
Using affirmations we can then turn those emotions into something more positive. Lets take the example of a friend who did something that hurt you and you are no longer friends.
Sally – Betrayal
You could then create an affirmation by bringing the emotion back to yourself and offering a more positive emotion:
“I can only betray myself, I only attract loyal people into my life”
Use this affirmation any time the negative one about that situation happens and see how you slowly release the power that past feeling gave you. Once you feel the affirmation has a stronger feeling than the emotion you wrote on the back of the past hurt you can then burn that piece of paper in a bowl and fully release the power it held over you and move forward with the affirmative statement.